Playing Poker with Jamie Dimon

May 19, 2012

I love a good poker game.  To rationalize my desire to play a lot, I side with those who claim poker to be a game of skill, which happens to be affected by luck.  In that vein, Poker is like a variation of Day Trading rather than just pure gambling.  In both Day Trading and Poker, you place very short-term investments (wagers) based on limited information, with a commitment to realize your gains or losses prior to the end of your session.  Your gains and losses are affected significantly by the actions of others and by random forces that you cannot control.  In fact, good poker players may have more and better information for their decisions than day traders.

In honor of JP Morgan Chase’s multi-billion dollar trading loss, I have invented a new poker game.  Designed for very high rollers, it is called “JP Morgan.”

In “JP Morgan,” instead of betting that you will win, you bet on whether you think you will lose.  If you are right and you actually do lose, you lose the pot.  You will not be rewarded for losing even if you bet on that outcome.  But if you are wrong and you win the poker hand in spite of betting against yourself, you also lose the pot since you made the wrong bet.

At the end of each hand, the money in the pot is flushed down the toilet.  Nobody ever wins.

Then each player at the table who did not participate in the betting action is required to ante up some additional money to tip the dealer, who must be compensated for making all of this possible.

-David Bass